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Ok so I finally broke down this morning and started the steroids. I dontapos; like taking something like that - but itapos;s a pretty low dose, so hopefully I wonapos;t have bad side effects. I just need to get rid of the rocking boat residing in my head.

This week started out really nice, but then turned into something so busy I just got frustrated and exhausted. Two or three days in a row where we donapos;t get home from the day until 8:45 at night? Thatapos;s exhausting. The high holidays are over soon, but then the other holidays are coming... Sigh.

My friend Lucy is here in town. Lots of drama surrounding that. She and my friend Giff had been talking/emailing for awhile, and he was starting to notice how controlling and pushy she is. I said Iapos;d never seen that side of her.

Well I guess they went out to dinner the other night and she was obnoxious. He said she was rude to the waiter, she was condescending to him, corrected his grammar three different times, and when he got a to-go box, she chastised him for doing it bc it is styrofoam and SHE usually brings her own tupperware. I was apologizing to him all over the place. Grief, I had no idea how bad she was

So at this point Giff had already invited all of us to a dinner party heapos;s having next weekend. She emails me yesterday and asks if I want to go together. I said "sorry, but M and I are going together. You can go with if youapos;d like..." She emails back "Youapos;re taking him? I thought he was a jerk to you. I canapos;t believe Giff is friends with him." WHA? I have no idea what she heard, or what she thinks, and so I didnapos;t reply back - because hello, I was offended. I guess things are either black or white, nothing in-between.

So I emailed Giff and was telling him about it and said I donapos;t even remember saying anything to her about any of it...he said he might have awhile ago - probably along the lines that bad decisions were made, but nothing intentional. I have never said anything about M being a jerk to anyone. Every single time things were talked about and just hadnapos;t worked out at the time. Nothing on purpose, just bad decisions/bad timing.

I told M about it last night and he was laughing saying "who IS this girl? She needs to just go back to Seattle." So then he came up with a brilliant idea - that he was going to act like a total jerk to me at the dinner party. He was actually getting really excited about it. A little too excited... Just kidding. We were both laughing about what we could do.

Anyway she emailed Giff saying "Did you know J is bringing M to your dinner party? How can either of you be friends with someone whoapos;s a jerk and treats women badly?" WHA? He had emailed back and said "You know, friends can sometimes treat other friends badly, and then apologize. Itapos;s called forgiveness." She emailed back "none of my friends treat other people badly." Wow - how perfect you and your friends are. He basically said he canapos;t see her anymore. Sheapos;s just too narrow and hard to deal with. I still havenapos;t emailed her back from yesterday - and Iapos;m not sure Iapos;m going to. I donapos;t know how I would respond and honestly, donapos;t care. If you canapos;t understand the idea of people making mistakes, or open to change or forgiveness, then I donapos;t really want to be friends with you.

Unfortunately this means M wonapos;t get to treat me badly at the dinner party. Iapos;m sure heapos;ll be a little disappointed with his acting debut being cancelled.

Let me just tell you how much of a good guy M is: He volunteered to babysit his friends 5 kids all last weekend - ages 13 through 3 - so him and his wife could go on a marriage retreat. Theyapos;ve been having marital problems and so he did this as a favor because heapos;s known them for 15 years and wants them to work things out. This went on from Friday to Sunday night. Saturday? Four of the kids had soccer games. Saturday night the 3 year old puked and had a fever and was sick all through Sunday. And he did this by himself. I told him I have never been so impressed by him as I was after that. He is truly a good guy.

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